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Author Topic: life gets in the way of bowling  (Read 4337 times)

xrayjay

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life gets in the way of bowling
« on: May 31, 2013, 05:04:23 PM »
It's been awhile BR...I see many OG's are still here and see a lot of newbies too posting. at least bowling is alive on BR lol....(not the same without Sawbones and the lady from orange county CA. - forgot her name)

Anyway, just want to get this off my chest. I don't think I'll ever be the bowler I wanted to be.

Ever time I see my game improving, life puts bowling on hold. I've been coached by many great minds of this sport, and each of them gave me the tools to improve my game. I witnessed these improvements every time, but life put my bowling days on hold.

First, it was a career change many years ago. Then came relocation to a new state a few years later. After that, I went back to school. Now, I'm a daddy.

Some of the coaches that helped me over the years are still posting on BR, and I'm thankful for their help. I'm just fortunate that I've worked with these men and woman and took pieces which molded my game. It's just too bad I couldn't keep the wheels rolling. Plus mentally, I was stressing a lot over the last 5 years which really didn't help me too.

Hopefully one day I can achieve my goals once I return to bowling with a clear head and a settled life. And one thing is for sure, I will always be a bowler(ing) in a league or not.

To the friends/coaches, yes I have a newborn. hopefully, you all get my text/pic of my baby girl before you read this. lol
Does a round object have sides? I say yes, pizza has triangles..

aka addik since 2003

 

Monster Pike

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #1 on: May 31, 2013, 05:18:35 PM »
Congrats on being a new daddy...   

Life got in the way of me bowling when I decided I wanted to coach either of my girl's travel softball teams.  Takes a major commitment level of time & money for travel sports. Coaching, pitching & hitting instructors, etc...   I've still bowled thru some of it, but it's hard, especially when the head coach schedules practices on the same night as bowling league...

Armourboy

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #2 on: May 31, 2013, 05:53:06 PM »
While I'm new around here, I can definitely understand. Mine is mostly due to work and shifting my schedule to the point I just can't league bowl anymore ( I work a rotating two week on nights, so I don't have consistent days off).

I used to bowl 3 leagues a week, and was just starting to do local  tournaments and things. Since then I've had two factories close on me and I got married.

I've been trying to teach my wife to bowl lately ( she has never done it much and her footwork is a nightmare) but she just doesn't see that its worth the money to do ( she goes on nights where they have 1 dollar games)

A plus though is that she enjoys watching me bowl, in her words " Its always neat to watch someone do something they are good at ". She lets me do it, and is gonna let me rebuild my arsenal being mine is getting pretty outdated ( newest is an Eraser PBT).

Sometimes it makes me sad to think " what could of been", but I figure if nothing else, once I retire I'll have that something to do other than sit around the house  ;D

Impending Doom

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #3 on: May 31, 2013, 06:35:48 PM »
I became a new daddy in August 09. Finished up my summer league, my wife had our little girl 2 weeks later, and I was done until last summer when I bowled a summer league with Pike and Sevenpin63. This year, I can't even find the time, just like Pike, to bowl due to all that comes with a child (I also added 2 more since 09), so life always take priority.

Steven

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #4 on: May 31, 2013, 07:42:04 PM »

I didn't throw a bowling ball from age 29 to 42. Between work, family, multiple sport youth coaching, and numerous volunteer activities, there wasn't time to toss the orb.

Trust me, there will be plenty of time later in life. Keep your priorities in order.

BallReviews-Removed0385

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #5 on: May 31, 2013, 08:14:02 PM »

xrayjay,

"Life getting in the way of bowling" is probably as it should be.  When bowling gets in the way of life we should re-examine our priorities. 

Bowling is great fun, and it challenges us, but it's still recreation.  When it becomes  "all consuming" we set ourselves up for disappointment in ALL aspects of life. 

There is a price to be paid for everything we do with our time.  For example, if someone wants to be a great golfer he must spend endless hours away from the "rest of life" in order to practice, practice, practice, etc.  And if someone wants to be a great husband and father, he will need to spend time and effort cultivating those relationships. 

Few people are successful all the time in finding that delicate balance of work and play that helps us become well-rounded individuals.  You can tell where a man's heart is by where he spends his time.

You can still be admired for your bowling abilities AND loved and respected by those who mean most to you.  Just try to strike some balance.  Compromises will need to be made from time to time, but you can still do it.

I love bowling. I love golf.  I enjoy many other things.  Someday, though, I hope my epitaph mentions the words "devoted husband, father, and trusted friend" rather than "self-absorbed man who endlessly chased a dream but never found happiness."

When bowling takes it's proper place in life our enjoyment with it will increase, and we can walk tall regardless of whose presence we are in.  Give yourself time.  Your love for bowling (by itself) isn't a bad thing, and it can resume at some future time when life allows. 

sevenpin63

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #6 on: May 31, 2013, 08:31:13 PM »
Congrats on the new baby.  8)

I know exactly what your talking about. When I was younger I would bowl three winter leagues a year and one summer league, but then life got in the way. The career, then family and kids. I didn't bowl for almost eight years, then I got back into it very slowly over the years.

But now that the kids are grown, and life has slowed down. I'm back into bowling full bore. Two winter leagues and one summer league, and bowling in the National Tourney again. So if you still have the itch down the road, you can get back into it when your older and its still fun.

St. Croix

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #7 on: May 31, 2013, 09:14:53 PM »
xrayjay, congratulations on parenthood. Look at your new status as an opportunity: you can pass on your love of bowling to your son or daughter. My wife and I have 3 adult children. When they were growing up, I missed the chance to share my love of bowling with them because I was too busy with work. Do not make the same mistake that I did.
"I spent half of my money on women, gambling, and booze. I wasted the other half."

W.C. Fields

xrayjay

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #8 on: June 01, 2013, 02:40:32 AM »

Very well said "notclay" and thanks guys for your comments, thoughts, and sharing your experiences. It's amazing to know we still got smart folks up in here! I know a few ppl who had put bowling before their kids. And they're not all fathers....

I can wait to return. At least mommy allows me to practice once a month. But it's tough.. No leagues, tourneys, no racing (RC), and no golf...hopefully I can go to Austin on Nov to watch F1 live on US soil! The family is "planning" on going....


Does a round object have sides? I say yes, pizza has triangles..

aka addik since 2003

JustRico

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #9 on: June 01, 2013, 11:24:37 AM »
Dude NEVER feel the need to apologize for being responsible! I enjoyed the times we worked out together and saw great improvement.
Congrats on the new addition and keep in touch...it was great hearing from you yesterday...
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Juggernaut

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #10 on: June 01, 2013, 12:16:50 PM »
xrayjay,

 Never, and I mean NEVER, feel a second of regret for putting real life ahead of something that only a few will ever make into a profitable situation.

 I never actually made it into the PBA, but I DID put in way to much concentration and effort trying to get there. I actually made it to the point I was decent enough to compete, but had my sponsor pull out on me at the last minute. Now, looking back, I am glad it happened.

 I missed far too much stuff with my family. Birthday parties, school recitals, PTO organizational activities, sports, etc....., you name it, I probably skipped it on my way to try to become a professional bowler and living MY dreams.

 Shortly after my sponsor fell through, my job situation changed drastically, and I had to totally give up bowling because my hours and my income no longer allowed for it.

 I spent 4 years away from competitive bowling. While I have never been able to reach the levels of ability that I had at one time (due to my age and not wanting to put that much effort into it again), I have discovered how to enjoy my REAL life with my wife, kids, and friends.

 Bowling is life for a select few, but I now understand what many of them had to "put on hold", or do without, to become the successful professionals that they are. Looking back now, and knowing what I know, I honestly do not think the sacrifices are/were truly worth it, at least not for me. I now worry far more, and much more greatly regret, the things I missed out on with my wife and kids than I ever will about what I missed out on the tour.

 Good to see you drop by. Haven't seen you around here for a while. Stop in and give us a shout every once in a while.
Learn to laugh, and love, and smile, cause we’re only here for a little while.

TREP

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #11 on: June 01, 2013, 09:10:29 PM »
LIFE IS A BIGGER CHALLANGE THAT BOWLING. I BOWLED FOR 3 YEARS FROM 1981 TO 1984 AND CARRIED A 220-225 AVERAGE. WENT INTO THE MILITARY AND NEVER BOWLED FOR 25 YEARS. JUST GOT BACK INTO IT AND COMPLETED MY FOURTH YEAR. AVERAGED 179-179-177 FOR THE THREE LEAGUES I BOWLED THIS YEAR.BIG DIFFERENCE, NOT SO MUCH. HAVE HAD OVER $600,000 IN SURGERIES AND CAN ONLY THROW A #12 BALL NOW. POINT IS THAT NO MATTER WHAT LIFE THROWS YOUR WAY THERE WILL BE A DAY WHEN YOU CAN DO IT AGAIN. ENJOY WHAT LIFE HAS GIVEN YOU AND SOMEDAY YOU WILL BE TEACHING YOUR CHILDREN HOW TO BOWL. THAT IS A MUCH MORE GRATIFYING FEELING THAT WHAT YOU ARE MISSING IN THE GAME RIGHT NOW...

xrayjay

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Re: life gets in the way of bowling
« Reply #12 on: June 03, 2013, 04:03:40 PM »
Thanks guys for sharing. Really enjoyed reading your experiences and advices.

I'll drop by ever so often, still a great forum for bowling and politics lol
Does a round object have sides? I say yes, pizza has triangles..

aka addik since 2003