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Author Topic: Are these guys in your league?  (Read 17144 times)

baccala8872

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Are these guys in your league?
« on: April 06, 2007, 01:28:22 AM »
And you know what, I wouldn't trade them for anything........!!!!

--The old dude who has memorized the schedule about 6 weeks in advance, and tells you what lanes he is on when he is standing in front of you as you are handing out the lane assignments for the night.

--The guy who, at the end of the night, gives you the entire blow-by-blow account of every shot he threw of every frame.  The series amounts to 512 (which we re-named our team "512" 5 years ago--the guy still has no idea that it's a playful rib at him) or something in that ballpark.

--The drunk team and stoner team.  Best nights are when they play each other.  It's like a substance-abuse fest.  Nothing but empty beer bottles and bags of Cool Ranch Doritos laying around.

--The team that refuses to move.  These are the guys still using the BUD II, or on the other end of the spectrum, Angular One's, and will be damned if they move even 1/4 of a board to the left as they whiff the head pin time and time again.  Their saving grace is the crossover light mixer strike, which convinces them that they are lined in.

--The Human Rain Delay team.  We have a guy who picks up his ball, curls it to his bicep, closes his eyes to visualize his shot, hyperextends his bowling arm to hold the ball dead straight out, and only then begins his approach.  If he ever won a PBA telecast, he would take home about $45.00.  This team has the obligatory old dude that stands there pondering his 6-pin conversion, only to throw a shot that would convert the 7-pin.

--The No Business Using That team.  You know this team.  The four guys collectively averaging 660, but all using Total NV's, and absolutely abusing the head pin by bashing it in the face all night.  See also:  Refuse To Move Team (above)

--The 100-mph Team.  The team of Plastic Fireballers whizzing the ball at the head pin at Mach 3, hitting the 1-3 and not understanding why they aren't carrying, and becoming more furious by the minute.

--The Team That Announces Everything.  "Congratulations to XXXXX, with a 203 game."  

--The Scoreboard Creepers.  These guys become more prevalent as the season winds down.  They hawk the back of your pair to see how you are doing against your opponents.  They are usually rosin bag target practice for us.  Playfully, of course.

--The Team with the Kiddy.  They have so many rules and fines, that Stephen Hawking is the only other guy that could possibly understand how much you or your teammates pay on a turkey, or an open, or a beer frame, or a washout conversion, or not getting the wood on a split, or not quacking and flapping your arms on a double, etc.  Their pair usually sounds like a generous slot machine in Atlantic City.

--The Owner's Team.  Usually stacked, with the absolute biggest cake shot ever on that pair for the night.

And because of these guys is the reason why I've been in this league for 1/3 of my entire life.

 

baccala8872

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #16 on: April 06, 2007, 11:19:31 AM »
Amish,

That Village People observation is one of the funniest things I've ever read!!

Good stuff!!

Crankenstein300

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #17 on: April 06, 2007, 11:21:34 AM »
Our team use to be the Lane Destroyers, with 3 members having good revs playing the same area on the lane. So we were guaranteed to have the track area burnt to a crisp by the middle of game 2. So all the track fluffers knew they were hosed when they bowled us lol.

RadioActive

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #18 on: April 06, 2007, 11:43:16 AM »
Man that is too funny recognized a bunch of them. We have the rain delay guy, ours squats and is down there for about 30 seconds and then throws his shot. We call him Snickers, because you can eat a whole one while he is bowling. I have to confess that I am on the "kitty" team. We have 4 weeks of bowling left and already have $250+ in our kitty.
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A K A

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #19 on: April 06, 2007, 12:11:04 PM »
I am sure someone other than me has a no thumber in their league that can't get within a foot of the 10 pin, we just tell him to speed the game up and push the reset button.

Ragnar

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #20 on: April 06, 2007, 12:20:42 PM »
quote:
I am sure someone other than me has a no thumber in their league that can't get within a foot of the 10 pin, we just tell him to speed the game up and push the reset button.

He's on my Tuesday night team.
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Hogsharley

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #21 on: April 06, 2007, 12:21:48 PM »
How about the "hootin' and holler after every shot team". We have one of these in my league and the captain is also the biggest A hole in the entire center. These guys are high fivein' and running around after every strike.

Well, 2 weeks ago as the league was winding down, this guy ran out his shot for 6 lanes! That's right, I said 6. He's lucky that my friend was on the approach at the time because he would have to have a bowling ball surgically removed from one of his orafices. I found out later that he didn't even win the game or his match point. He only won the handicap pot, maybe $40-$50.

Last week they were playing on the far end of the alley and there they are, hootin' and hoolering again. I find out after scores are posted that they only won 2 or 27 points. LOL
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Fluff E Bunnie

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #22 on: April 06, 2007, 01:01:05 PM »
How about the bowling diva team?  These are my favorite teams to play against.

They complain about the amount of balls you have on the ball rack, but they are taking up half of the thing themselves.   They don't realize that a team of lower average bowlers may need a spare ball more than them since they are not throwing constant strikes.  

They strut around like they are bowling gods but miss 3 out of 4 ten pins (Hmm... where's that spare ball?).  Note: A bowler trying to be intimidating is the funniest sight on Earth to behold.  

They are angry after every single shot.

They make little comments to each other like little cowards but they can't say anything to your face.

When you proceed to rock them so hard with your "too many balls" they kick the cover off the ball return and the league secretary has to come over and discipline them.
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triggerman

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #23 on: April 06, 2007, 01:02:10 PM »
how bout the drunk team that flirts with the waitresses

oh wait that is my team

these are funny we have all those guys in my leagues

how bout the "we are in last place and dont give a squat" team
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cnimsk

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #24 on: April 06, 2007, 01:02:38 PM »
What about a "Rules" team. The team that says....you're 300 doesn't count because you slammed the wall after throwing you're twelve strike kind of team. The team, that if you get a string going against them really look like they will pull out a machine to check you're bowling ball right there.

Or the "No humor" team. The team that can't take a joke if their lives depended upon it. The team that never says congratulations to another teams bowler and are surly all the time.

Chuck

Edited on 4/6/2007 1:02 PM

Spider Ball Bowler

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #25 on: April 06, 2007, 01:03:23 PM »
You guys forgot about the Constantly Late Team/Guy.  You know the team you bowl that you get into the 3rd or 4th frame when their 5th bowler finally shows up.  Then you have to wait while they catch up their frames.  That's my least favorite.

There is one team on my Monday night league that always has one or two guys show up in the 4th frame.
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a_ak57

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #26 on: April 06, 2007, 01:09:14 PM »
I'm part of the Crazy Son-of-a-b*tch team.  We make fun of each other and do very sarcastic slow claps when one of our teammates misses an easy spare or something, of course all in jest.  Never bother the other team directly though, just give them the feeling that we're missing a few pins upstairs.
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Scolai

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #27 on: April 06, 2007, 01:19:59 PM »
We've got that guy you would call "The Creeper".  It's like he's sneaking up on the foul line for the first 2 steps of his approach, only to have him run for the next 3 steps and fire a cannon-ball shot at the head pin.

Another guy that bowls on the late league after ours is "The Jumper".  His pivot step launches him about 6-8" into the air, and he lands/slides and releases the ball all at the same time with about 2 revs.

Their unusual bowling styles notwithstanding, they're pretty good guys all the same.
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KDawg77

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #28 on: April 06, 2007, 01:25:08 PM »
And then there's the "Slow-ass Practicer". The person who painfully follows bowling etiquette and wastes time when there is none.
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Let It Bleed

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #29 on: April 06, 2007, 01:29:54 PM »
quote:
--The drunk team and stoner team. Best nights are when they play each other. It's like a substance-abuse fest. Nothing but empty beer bottles and bags of Cool Ranch Doritos laying around.

 


priceless...we actually call a team "Team Ganja"...
they got out to lanes 41-42 (house only goes up to 40) for team meetings...
after those meetings...they trip EVERY 4 pin...and when they start carrying dirty, you hear them yell over the entire league...it's awesome
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Easy10pins

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Re: Are these guys in your league?
« Reply #30 on: April 06, 2007, 01:32:51 PM »
What about the "Catch Phrasers"

Last night the opposing team kept throwing out those nifty one liner catch phases...


"Man on the HOOK!"

"You got robbed"

"Delivery Official"

"10 in the pit"

And they would say it loud enough to hear throughout the center.
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