Author Topic: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things (Read 9875 times)

another300 · « **on:** March 13, 2008, 11:52:10 AM »

This from what I understand and have seen is pretty bad with some bowlers. An older guy who had since calmed way down, I was told used to punch the lockers, throw chairs, kick the ball returns and do all kinds of other destructive things after making a poor shot or missing a spare.
Things like this were occurring at the center I bowl at about 5+ years ago. So, during our meeting, the bowling alley manager attened our meeting and address the entire league. He said, "Any bowler seen kicking the returns, punching the score console or defacing the alley property would have to miss the following week of bowling and would have to pay for any damage done to what they took their anger out on."
I tell you what, there were a few people having to miss bowling for a few weeks but finally, it helped "them" keep their anger in check.
Any other bowling centers you guys have bowled at ever have to go to these measures to "help" some bowlers out with their anger issues?

« **Reply #31 on:** March 14, 2008, 10:06:55 AM »

AngloBowler,
Thanks. PM is in the process.

--------------------
Lane Carter, Strike Zone Pro Shops - Salt Lake City, Utah
Brunswick Amateur Staff

Luckyzzzzz · « **Reply #32 on:** March 14, 2008, 11:41:31 AM »

I abide by the fact that no one can control their feelings. Your feelings are a natural, innate response to a given situation. What you can control, however, is your response to those feelings/emotions. It is easier for some people to do this than others, but it can be done. I'm able to think of the ramifications of my actions most of the time before I do them, and use that to keep myself in check. I'm a bigger guy, and I don't enjoy fixing stuff I break, so I just don't do it.

Anglo, you sound like you've been battling this a while. Is it that you have a physical response to your anger before you are able to think about it? Kinda like having a Bruce Banner thing going on? If so, then that is an extreme case out of the norm.

As I bartend and work in the Pro Shop at the lanes where I bowl, I try to coem across professionally and treat the equipment there with respect. (even if I am a little goofy at times) There are a handful of "kids" that bowl in leagues with me (and some that work there too) that I get onto about losing their tempers and being foolish. My biggest pet peeve, though, is our General Manager who kicks the ball returns and hits chairs when he get mad. It's embarrassing because I work there too and have to hear people talk about him. One week, when he went to the bathroom during league, on of the other bowlers taped up targets that he had photocopied to all the ball returns. Another time, after missing a spare with his strike ball, the GM came back and kicked his spare ball (on a rack under the ball return) and knocked it into the other balls on the rack. When questioned about it, he was like "What? That was my ball!". So, a frame or two later, the same guy that put up the targets earlier in the year wound up missing a spare of his own. He then proceeded to walk two lanes over and kick the GM's spare ball on the rack. He looked around and said "What? That's what we do here when we miss spares, right?!"

AngloBowler · « **Reply #33 on:** March 14, 2008, 12:04:16 PM »

Lucky,

I think Bruce Banner may be overstating the point a little

Basically I've always had a short temper, and never really known why. It's just been a case of my trying to come to terms with it such that it affects my life in a minimal way (such as only getting angry when it is appropriate). I've never been violent towards anything animate when I've lost my temper, but I do appreciate that because of my size (6'4 about 230 lbs in your money) an outburst can make other people who don't know me worried.

I wouldn't describe it as a "red mist" scenario either, I think this is a cop out to try and avoid taking responsibility for your actions when angry. I have enough control to not injure any people when I lose my temper (except maybe myself) but when I'm angry it seems that's the extent of my control until it passes.

I understand what makes me angry, but as I've said before, anger bypasses the rational part of your brain. You astutely point out that learning to deal with anger is important. More important is learning how not to become angry, see the link I've posted earlier. I'm working on this, and it's not going to happen overnight. What I have found is that for me, it takes a conscious effort not to get angry about something, and most of my triggers centre around one of two things:

My expectations of myself

My expectations of the world around me

When I, or the world, don't align with these expectations, frustration occurs, if this mismatch continues, then I get angry. It's a long and involved process, trying to force my higher brain to kick in at these times and rationalise to myself and prevent the anger "taking hold".

I can say one thing with certainty. I don't enjoy being angry, that's why I've spent most of my life trying to reduce the impact that anger has on my life in general, and my bowling in particular. But it's not an overnight thing, and people only see a snapshot of me being angry, they rarely see what I was like 15 years ago, 5 years ago, last time I was angry, and they will likely not see me in 2 years either when i hope it will be better again.

I hope this provides a little insight...
--------------------
Reporting from England

APheLion · « **Reply #34 on:** March 14, 2008, 12:13:11 PM »

i am guilty for kicking the ball returns
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When a house bowler misses the mark, misses the break point and strike, for many ppl its called a wallshot. When a pro does that its call adjustment

When a house bowler gets his finger stuck in the ball and fall on the lanes, for many ppl its called lame bowler. When a pro does that its called the Machuga flop! ha i like this one.

baltimora · « **Reply #35 on:** March 14, 2008, 12:28:36 PM »

quote:
The center where I am currently employed, we have 3 bays of 24(72 total), 1-48 on one side of the house and 49-72 on the other side. Between 24 and 25 there is a partition that extends from the foul line to about half way on the approach. That partition used to be a target for kicking and punching, at least until we installed 3/4" plywood behind the drywall. As for ball returns or anything else, we accept cash and major credit cards as forms of payment.
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Just another house bowler hack...

i'll keep this mind while i am bowling second place tonite. maybe i should bring my second credit card in case....
--------------------

Timotheus · « **Reply #36 on:** March 14, 2008, 12:38:04 PM »

quote:
The center where I am currently employed, we have 3 bays of 24(72 total), 1-48 on one side of the house and 49-72 on the other side. Between 24 and 25 there is a partition that extends from the foul line to about half way on the approach. That partition used to be a target for kicking and punching, at least until we installed 3/4" plywood behind the drywall. As for ball returns or anything else, we accept cash and major credit cards as forms of payment.
--------------------
Just another house bowler hack...

This sounds suspiciously like, and indeed after checking your profile it is, AMF Strike-N-Spare in Mattydale, NY. I've been bowling there for almost 20 years now.

That being said, everyone loses their temper in some way. Currently I'm in a very very good situation where I've got a great job, don't have to pay rent or utilities, and can put my income towards paying off my car and student loans and putting what's left into savings. In that regard I have very little to worry about outside of my job, so its easy to get upset while I'm bowling. However I don't get angry or frustrated when pins don't fall, mainly because I usually know exactly how to fix it, but its when I can't make a shot or I can't carry at all no matter what adjustment I make and my opponents or anyone else in the league can carry seemingly everything they throw.

I used to kick ball returns, when I was like 8, got yelled at by the house owner and never did it again. I do take out my frustrations on my own stuff, like my brace when I used to wear one, my drink if its like a gatorade bottle, or I'll clap my hands together hard, and sometimes I'll just let out a gutteral yell at the pindeck. Most often though I come back muttering to myself.
--------------------
15.5# MoRich NSane LevRG
16# AMF Nighthawk (replacing soon)
16# Roto-Grip Neptune
16# Colombia White Dot

More to come!

Edited on 3/14/2008 12:48 PM

novawagonmaster · « **Reply #37 on:** March 14, 2008, 01:01:00 PM »

quote:
quote:
It kills me to watch grown men act like 3 year olds over a game.
I take bowling as serious as anyone else, yet somehow I can refrain from acting like a child when I get tapped (or worse yet, actually miss what I was throwing at!)

Yes you can. And that's fine. Everyone is not you. I am not condoning willful damage to property of the bowling centre, but you must accept that other people are not the same as you. You also make the assumption that you know what it is that someone has lost their temper about: Person gets tapped > Person gets mad therefore, person lost temper because of the tap... No. Not always.

No-one plans to lose their temper (well, non-sociopaths anyhow) and anyone who's had to deal with it like I have will appreciate that it's not easy learning how to cope with it and reduce it's likelihood. Some of the stories here are far worse than anything I've ever done when I've lost my temper, let alone when I've got angry in a bowling centre.

Anyone who has anger issues might like to try this site:

http://www.pe2000.com/anger.htm

It's helped me a lot.
--------------------
Reporting from England

You're joking, right?

--------------------
Jon (in Ohio)
aka: Rico Swerve~

AngloBowler · « **Reply #38 on:** March 14, 2008, 03:46:58 PM »

Joking? I'm not sure of your point...
--------------------
Reporting from England

tenpin477 · « **Reply #39 on:** March 14, 2008, 04:46:10 PM »

I do get a little mad sometimes, I might smack my hand on my side, or maybe hit my fist on the table, only once, but usually only after a series of bad shots. One missed spare just has me coming back wondering what I did wrong.

SUNDEVIL23 · « **Reply #40 on:** March 14, 2008, 04:56:48 PM »

quote:
Lucky,

I think Bruce Banner may be overstating the point a little

Basically I've always had a short temper, and never really known why. It's just been a case of my trying to come to terms with it such that it affects my life in a minimal way (such as only getting angry when it is appropriate). I've never been violent towards anything animate when I've lost my temper, but I do appreciate that because of my size (6'4 about 230 lbs in your money) an outburst can make other people who don't know me worried.

I wouldn't describe it as a "red mist" scenario either, I think this is a cop out to try and avoid taking responsibility for your actions when angry. I have enough control to not injure any people when I lose my temper (except maybe myself) but when I'm angry it seems that's the extent of my control until it passes.

I understand what makes me angry, but as I've said before, anger bypasses the rational part of your brain. You astutely point out that learning to deal with anger is important. More important is learning how not to become angry, see the link I've posted earlier. I'm working on this, and it's not going to happen overnight. What I have found is that for me, it takes a conscious effort not to get angry about something, and most of my triggers centre around one of two things:

My expectations of myself

My expectations of the world around me

When I, or the world, don't align with these expectations, frustration occurs, if this mismatch continues, then I get angry. It's a long and involved process, trying to force my higher brain to kick in at these times and rationalise to myself and prevent the anger "taking hold".

I can say one thing with certainty. I don't enjoy being angry, that's why I've spent most of my life trying to reduce the impact that anger has on my life in general, and my bowling in particular. But it's not an overnight thing, and people only see a snapshot of me being angry, they rarely see what I was like 15 years ago, 5 years ago, last time I was angry, and they will likely not see me in 2 years either when i hope it will be better again.

I hope this provides a little insight...
--------------------
Reporting from England

T-M-I buddy

Author Topic: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things (Read 9875 times)

another300

Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things

Re: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things

Luckyzzzzz

Re: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things

AngloBowler

Re: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things

APheLion

Re: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things

baltimora

Re: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things

Timotheus

Re: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things

novawagonmaster

Re: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things

AngloBowler

Re: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things

tenpin477

Re: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things

SUNDEVIL23

Re: Bowlers bad tempers and hitting things