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Author Topic: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.  (Read 17026 times)

Dewey24

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Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« on: September 30, 2009, 01:15:19 AM »
The spoiled rich kid:
1. I was visiting a pro shop and a kid comes in with 6 or 7 balls, all of them massacred. "My parents bought me a spinner for Christmas and I've been practicing"
2. A kid walks into my brother's pro shop and says he wants a new Jigsaw. here's the catch he only throws a 12lbs ball. My brother tries to explain to him he is really wasting his money and lite weight equipment uses different weight blocks, and he can get the same reaction out of a less expensive ball. Nope Mm and Dad say I can buy this one, I want this one.
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Dewey24

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #16 on: September 30, 2009, 12:21:03 PM »
"The one who needs a 45 second shot clock because 25 seconds isn't enough time to get through his pre-shot checklist."


We have 2 guys like this on our mens league. God forbid you have a night with both of them on either side of you. You never make it home.
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John D Davis

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #17 on: September 30, 2009, 12:21:09 PM »
Something that cracks me up is when someone goes brooklyn and then kicks the ball return because it didnt carry... Often I see that.
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RSalas

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #18 on: September 30, 2009, 12:23:34 PM »
quote:
The one who needs a 45 second shot clock because 25 seconds isn't enough time to get through his pre-shot checklist.


So you *were* watching me bowl when I was at All Star Sandy, then.  
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echidapus

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #19 on: September 30, 2009, 12:32:42 PM »
Last year there was this guy next to us and he had the front 7 (190-200 average bowler).  He gets up the there is a ball jam and he gets pissed that there are to many bowling balls on the return.   He almost starts a fight with the other team.   His team stays quiet, because it's all of their balls on the return.

He proceeds to go up and mess up his string of strikes and continuingly trying to start a fight with the other team.

lol.   Whenever we bowl him now, we make sure the ball return is full
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Bluff

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #20 on: September 30, 2009, 12:34:48 PM »
quote:
the high avg league bowler who doesn't throw if there's someone on the approach 4 lanes over!


yea 4 lane curtiosy and bowls 150 game lol
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Uncle Crusty

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #21 on: September 30, 2009, 12:51:37 PM »
Great topic. Some friends and I are convinced we could write a "1001 'Those Guys' of Bowling" book that would be a huge smash hit. That's how many "those guys" we see in leagues and tournaments. Some of my favorites:

 
  • The guy that claps out shots from the first frame of the night through the last frame of the night. And finishes with 560. Every week.
  • The guy in tournaments that runs out the second hit in the tenth to "save" 185 when the scoring pace of the building is 240.
  • The guy that averages 165 and strolls into league with the slicked back hair wearing a Hammer mock neck, slacks, the best shoes on the market, and carrying 8 new pills.
  • Conversely, the guy that strolls into league with a wife beater, sweatpants, shoes held together with duct tape, and a Teal Rhino Pro that's never been cleaned and averages 238. This guy is especially fun to drink with after league.
  • The guy who goes 250-150-250 and tells you he "lost the carry" game 2, even though he most likely had about three 6-counts, a 7-count, and three 8-counts.
  • The guy who reminds everyone about every honor score he's ever shot when someone else shoots one.
  • The guy who, when you ask how he bowled the other night, will tell you the carry sucked, the pattern was impossible, and he was both sick and hurt. Then he'll tell you he shot 760.
  • The guy who puts on a body english clinic while the ball is going down the lane.
  • The guy who shows up to league wearing a shirt with his name on the back. Come on, bro, it's just league.
  • The guy that insists on giving you a high five after every shot, whether you struck or missed a 5-pin by 18 inches. This guy also has a tendency to give harder and harder high fives the better he's bowling.
  • The guy who looks around after throwing a strike to make sure everyone saw it and realizes how great he is.

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NoseofRI

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #22 on: September 30, 2009, 12:55:12 PM »
Solid list there Crusty, going to expand and add a bit:

  • That 165 average with 7 balls, mock hammer shirt, best shoes, you can''''t forget about him having his name on the back his shirt

  • The guy in league that after throwing a shot and finishing the frame holds HIS hand out for YOU to give him five and will stand there until you do

  • The house rat that is lighting it up that night coming over to you after your 92873493827 wrap, flat, plaque, and ringing 7, 8, 9, and 10-pin left on the night and complaining to you about his carry

  • The 230 average house rat that will talk trash all night because he''s out averaging you by 5-10 pins and just beat you by 50+ that night, yet when you challenge him to bowl pots he asks for sticks
  • Lefties


Edited on 9/30/2009 12:58 PM
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VIXIV

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #23 on: September 30, 2009, 12:56:16 PM »
There's a dude in one of the centers here that my old teammate and I call "John Elway" because he holds the ball up by his head when he's standing on the approach. Then he ends up looking like THIS after the release because he likes to...do that...or something.
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Crankenstein300

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #24 on: September 30, 2009, 01:01:29 PM »
Crusty has a great list so I too will add to it
 

  • The guy that takes a minute or two standing on the approach and never moving, almost like he is waiting for a higher being to take over his body and bowl for him  

  • The one that motions you and insists that you bowl even though you just stepped up to the return and it's his turn to bowl anyway to keep the correct flow going  

  • The guy that yells incoherently at the line in a language that sounds like Klingon  

  • The guy that drinks the entire night and shoots honor scores while barely being able to stand up

  • The flirt, that you either have to go hunt down to get to bowl or skip because he's too busy schmoozing with the female bowlers all across the house. 50/50 on if this guy is married too.

  • The local ball staffer that you ask technical stuff about concerning the new ball he just got and can't tell you anything about it. "I just got (insert ball driller's name here) to drill it and have no idea what it's going to do."
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trynabbest

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #25 on: September 30, 2009, 01:15:09 PM »
I wasn't going to post anything that was already said and i haven't seen this one yet. Me and my brother find it increasingly fun the sheer amount of loft some guys use. The higher the ball goes up the harder i laugh. There are 2 or 3 guys in our league like this and every time they bowl us i have to sit somewhere else and not watch them bowl. Once i looked up and just saw the ball in the air like half way down the lane and had to stop my approach and reset. These guys kill me in league

Also i find random profanity funny, but not just any random swearing. Its the swearing that happens in that one weird moment that the whole alley is quiet and you hear the clearest expletives you could ever hear lol, and its always awkward for anyone around because even people not near the league heard it lol.
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Monster Pike

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #26 on: September 30, 2009, 01:22:45 PM »
The guy that "Flaps" after his shot...

The guy that picks up his ball, puts his hand over the air blower then turns & talks to his buddies about the other night or whatever it is they're talking about.  Just f-ing bowl & talk after your shot.......  He does this at league warmup practice also, holding up lanes for others.
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eagle101

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #27 on: September 30, 2009, 01:24:05 PM »
MOnster you know that guy too?  During practice he needs two lanes!!!!
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Joe from Buffalo
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Xcessive_Evil

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #28 on: September 30, 2009, 02:28:03 PM »
Only 2.

1) The guy who is 25 yards past drunk, yet doesn't understand why he's bowling so bad while tripping over everything in a 10-foot radius.

2) The guy who never bowls bad.  For him, it's the crappy lanes that made him look bad.


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MI 2 AZ

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #29 on: September 30, 2009, 02:48:38 PM »
Personal Space Invader - Bowler who continues to talk to you even though it''s your turn to bowl and you start to go through your pre-shot routine, picking up the ball, and then standing on the approach while the Personal Space Invader continues to talk to you, standing behind you on the approach.  Usually a variant of:

It''s Only About Me - Bowler whose every conversation centers around their bowling. This bowler may approach you and ask how you are doing, but before you can reply, they will start to tell you about the bad breaks they are getting and/or how great they are doing.  Pray that a teammate calls you to tell you that it''s your turn to bowl as it is the only way to get away unless this is also a Personal Space Invader who will follow you to your lane.




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Edited on 10/7/2009 3:07 PM
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jwcorn01

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Re: Types of bowlers that crack you up around the lanes.
« Reply #30 on: September 30, 2009, 05:52:03 PM »
Yesterday, guy missed a ten pin by throwing in channel before it got half way down, attempted to intentionally foul and failed, and came back hurriedly to his seat with arms folded. Later, he told his wife "its just a game" when she whined she was ready to leave.
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