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Author Topic: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic  (Read 5653 times)

Necromancer

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New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« on: January 08, 2009, 06:33:16 AM »
So I am sitting here answering another nuclear engineering question regarding a pipe material that I was responsible for putting in these new reactors.  I basically changed steel piping to plastic piping because it corrodes less and looks cool.

First off, I think bowling ball testing from the manufacturer to online sites like Buddiesproshop are misleading and worthless.  Well I guess they are good if you plan to use a ball for about 10 games and then either are rich enough to buy another, plan to get it resurfaced constantly, or are just dumb in the head and need an arsenal of like 10-20 balls.

My way: treat bowling balls like building materials.  You think they test the steel beams in buildings based on how it is when new?  Hizell no.  They fatigue it, stress it, until it breaks.  They want to know how it will be years from now when it ain't sparkling new but covered in rust and garbage but still performing strong!

So instead of showing what balls do OOB and showing how it hooks all over the lane when it has 0% oil absorption, take it to the limits.  My method in outline form:

-Show me the ball OOB and show me the ball after it has been dipped and soaked in oil overnight (literally)
-Wipe off the oil and make sure the coverstock is good and soaked
-Now show me the ball OOB on a constant shot with a robot
-Robot should be standardized with 2-3 industry standard shots (straight up, coast-to-coast, and something in between, with a fixed speed and fixed axis of rotation)
-Now show me the ball after it has been soaked in oil (representing the ball after hundreds of games after poor care)
-The before and after will represent the range the ball can do performance wise

What bowling ball companies fail to do is show any range.  Yet in every other industry, ranges are required.  You don't see that rare steal beam get listed to break at 10,000 psi tensile strength when the range is actually much less or much more.

This is Necromancer and the New Ball Testing Method.

DISCUSS
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M-H: Storm Shift Gravity, Hammer Black Widow
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2008-09 Year 215.000 2008-09 Tourney 177.360 Last Tourney 182.667
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Current Arsenal Gallery
H: Brunswick Fury, Columbia 300 EPX T1
M-H: Storm Shift Gravity, Hammer Black Widow
M: Storm X-Factor Vertigo, Ebonite Predator
M-L: Storm Recharge
S: Viz-A-Ball White
Bench: Brunswick Target Spare Zone, Ebonite 14 Fun Ball
GEMS: Brunswick Quantum Helix, Brunswick Quantum Double Helix

2008-09 Year 215.000 2008-09 Tourney 177.360 Last Tourney 182.667

Hall of Fame BR Member Since: April 3, 2001


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another300

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #1 on: January 08, 2009, 02:41:20 PM »
Why would bowling companies want to spend money on this? Longevity isn't their main concern.  Selling bowling balls is.

tenpin477

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #2 on: January 08, 2009, 02:42:22 PM »
Why would a ball company want to advertise that their ball will die if you don't take care of it?

I mean its obvious, but you don't point out the negatives in your product lmao.

Nor Cal Bowler

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #3 on: January 08, 2009, 02:45:09 PM »
what a frickin' moron...
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boomtown24

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #4 on: January 08, 2009, 02:57:54 PM »
For a nuclear engineer you aren't very bright, or you failed marketing 101.  Either way it's an idea that won't sell anything.  Go back to the drawing board.

Uncle Crusty

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #5 on: January 08, 2009, 03:03:24 PM »
While we're at it, why don't we request that automobile manufacturers stop being misleading in television commercials by showing new vehicles fresh off the line? I think they should put 225,000 miles on a car, change the oil exactly once over that span, always use cheap gasoline, drive it through harsh, salt-laden winter driving conditions and never wash it so it rusts like crazy, never vacuum or clean the interior, and beat on it by powerbraking it at stop lights for fun and jacking up the RPMs every time it's accelerated. That's the car that should be in TV commercials.

Seriously, guy. Stop whining because you're too lazy to clean your bowling equipment. It's no one's fault, least of all Chris Forry and his staff, that your balls back up after 6 months because they're saturated beyond help and have half-inch deep slices all through the covers.
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directdrill

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #6 on: January 08, 2009, 03:04:52 PM »
I hope that as an engineer your decision to change from steel piping to plastic piping was based on more on the fact that it corrodes less than "it looks cool."
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Hook 'em Horns!

"Stats are for losers, I like winning games." - Will Muschamp, Texas Defensive Coordinator

Edited on 1/8/2009 4:05 PM

DP3

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #7 on: January 08, 2009, 03:10:29 PM »
Sheer brilliance.
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Necromancer

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #8 on: January 08, 2009, 03:10:56 PM »
How about a company unassociated with the bowling companies then?  Something like CNET.com.  Instead have it like ballreviews.com where people actually volunteer to reveal the truth of bowling balls.  Money will be paid by subscribers to this service at a low fee per month.  This money will go into the volunteers time and in purchasing new equipment.  The site will start off online based only and may expand to a monthly magazine that also gives unbiased info on other bowling stuff.  The problem with bowling is that the companies have too much leverage.  Give the power to the bowlers!
Current Arsenal Gallery
H: Brunswick Fury, Columbia 300 EPX T1
M-H: Storm Shift Gravity, Hammer Black Widow
M: Storm X-Factor Vertigo, Ebonite Predator
M-L: Storm Recharge
S: Viz-A-Ball White
Bench: Brunswick Target Spare Zone, Ebonite 14 Fun Ball
GEMS: Brunswick Quantum Helix, Brunswick Quantum Double Helix

2008-09 Year 215.000 2008-09 Tourney 177.360 Last Tourney 182.667

Hall of Fame BR Member Since: April 3, 2001


Currently Retired from Bowling

NoseofRI

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #9 on: January 08, 2009, 03:12:30 PM »
Seriously Necro, you're an engineer.  STAY OUT OF MARKETING!!!!!

Arstine

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #10 on: January 08, 2009, 03:22:05 PM »
I kinda like the idea.  Something like Consumer Reports that does independent testing of the equipment.

another300

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #11 on: January 08, 2009, 03:23:12 PM »
quote:
How about a company unassociated with the bowling companies then? Something like CNET.com. Instead have it like ballreviews.com where people actually volunteer to reveal the truth of bowling balls. Money will be paid by subscribers to this service at a low fee per month. This money will go into the volunteers time and in purchasing new equipment. The site will start off online based only and may expand to a monthly magazine that also gives unbiased info on other bowling stuff. The problem with bowling is that the companies have too much leverage. Give the power to the bowlers!  


Now you're on to something.  Although I would have to take the route of a politician.  Why you ask?  Well because it would be more profitable. I would take bribes from these companies if their "new" balls performed badly.  A couple hundred thousand, and I would "praise" their "new" balls. They don't pay, I don't play!

leftyinsnellville

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #12 on: January 08, 2009, 03:24:46 PM »
Design me a bowling machine that I can make in my garage, and figure out a way to get the bowling ball companies to send me free balls and I'll do it.  I already have the video gear and know how to post the videos.  How much could a bucket of lane oil cost?
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Nails

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #13 on: January 08, 2009, 03:52:14 PM »
quote:
So I am sitting here answering another nuclear engineering question regarding a pipe material that I was responsible for putting in these new reactors.  I basically changed steel piping to plastic piping because it corrodes less and looks cool.


Stupidest....  Post.... Ever.

Ya know Necro, if you were 1/100th as good or smart as you pretend to be, you'd almost qualify as an imbecile.  I actually like it when you post about new subjects it gives me a chance to feel superior about a subject that I know little about.  Actually, that's a pretty good idea.  Someone with a lot of time should find all of Necro's posts and make a list of some of his strange thoughts just to see how many things he knows nothing about.
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Uncle Crusty

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Re: New Way To Test New Bowling Balls - Epic
« Reply #14 on: January 08, 2009, 04:27:24 PM »
quote:
Stupidest....  Post.... Ever.

Ya know Necro, if you were 1/100th as good or smart as you pretend to be, you'd almost qualify as an imbecile.  I actually like it when you post about new subjects it gives me a chance to feel superior about a subject that I know little about.  Actually, that's a pretty good idea.  Someone with a lot of time should find all of Necro's posts and make a list of some of his strange thoughts just to see how many things he knows nothing about.
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Telling it like it is.


Post and Idea of the Day.
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"Nobody in the game of football should be called a genius. A genius is somebody like Norman Einstein."

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